I wanted to go running tonight before I went to Japanese class but I’m feeling all tense and yuck and shaky. I’m not sure if a run is the best thing. It might help but I’m a bit worried about the shaky part of it. I feel like some kind of weird science experiment on sleep deprivation or something. Instead of resting over the weekend, I spent most of my time fitting into other people’s plans and doing things I didn’t want to do.
I’m getting really sick of my life. I have so much going on that by Thrusday I’m just burnt out every week. Then I spend the weekend resting to get the energy to do it all again. That’s no way to live. Still less than a week and I’m off on hols. When I get back, I’m only doing Japanese classes once a week – at the moment I’m doing 1 hour classes twice a week which wouldn’t be so bad except they are 8-9 and that means I’m always late to bed after I travel home and get my shit together. Next term I’m doing 1 class for 2 hours 7-9. That will be much better. So much else going on too but I don’t really want to talk about it cos it’s just whinging cos I’m tired and run down.
I think I might axe the run but walk into the city to my class. At least I’ll get some exercise.
I just want to get back to being the person I was – happy and healthy and full of beans.
Edit: I did end up walking into class and about halfway I felt a huge weight lift off me (unfortunately only figuratively!). I really think I need to be in motion to relax. Now if I get a good night’s sleep, I’ll be even finer.