After my last post, I’ve been thinking about things going on in my life and some solutions for those issues. After all, there is no point identifying issues without taking steps to rectify them.
One of the major issues I have is being in a situation where I’m powerless – problems with housemates and neighbours. You tend to get the idea in this world of self-help and Oprahisms, that every problem can be resolved and that all you have to do is talk things out. But that’s not always the case, is it? What happens when you discuss things, you follow the rules but the other person just is like ‘so what? screw you, buddy’.
That’s the attitude I get from my housemates. But I think too a lot of it is my own attitude. I don’t like them being in MY house. I don’t like them at all. I get tense when they are home even they aren’t doing a thing. And that leads to other problems – I’ll go out to avoid them, and going out means going to a cafe where temptation is always an issue. It also means eating, because that’s one way to deal with the problem.
I’ve been thinking about this a lot. I can’t move at the moment because I need to save money. Plus rents are ridiculous at the moment. And it’s insanely hard to find a place. The thing is, I need to deal with this. By overeating and using food to deal with it, I’m not hurting them at all just myself. It’s not a solution. I have to learn to deal with these emotions – and maybe just lighten the fuck up for a while. The change needs to come from my own way of perceiving problems and then finding ways to deal with them, since I can change the problems themselves.