Finally, the 73s. I’ve been waiting to get here for the last month. It really has been the most bumpy month in my weight loss and the first time I’ve had a real set back. Thankfully, I’m back down to pioneering territory.
I think the longer you spend losing weight, the less fluctuations of the scales mean to you. Sure it’s always nice to see a steady decline but, when you’re starting out, a slight gain one week is a huge disaster. Even a small loss is hell. I remember a few weeks in, I only lost a few grams and I was devastated.
Now I realise that weigh in isn’t like getting an exam back. It’s not like getting a pass or fail grade. And it definitely isn’t a reward or punishment from some great scale god somewhere. All it is, is a reflection of how much I weigh at a specific moment in time and that reflection can include many non-fat related factors.
This isn’t weight related but I decided ages ago I wanted to see Martha Wainwright when she toured. Then, because I had to wait so long to get paid, her show last Thursday was sold out. That made me very sad until I got the street press this week and saw a second show announced. Except that I again had no money and the show is on Monday night. I debated spending my rent money on a ticket – my landlords come around to collect the rent in person and I never know if they are going to turn up. I thought of ringing to see when they plan on coming around but that might remind them that I owe rent.
Yesterday, I phoned about tickets and found out Monday night’s show had sold out but she was also doing one on Tuesday. I ran down after work and scored my ticket. When fate is screaming at you to do something, you have to listen.
So anyway, since no one else I know is into Martha Wainwright so I’m going alone on my own. I’m a bit nervous about that but I’d much rather go on my own than not at all. I’d much rather go on my own than drag along someone who doesn’t want to be there.
Still I do get a bit self-conscious about these things and imagine everyone is thinking looking at the loser with no friends even though I’ve never thought that if I’ve ever seen someone alone at a band. Actually I’ve never even paid attention to whether someone is alone or not.
Btw. I dunno if anyone noticed this but I had a typo in my weigh in weight last week. I said I was 24.5 kg. Thank God that’s not true.