Today sucks

On the way to work, the earphones on my ipod stopped working.  That meant I had to spend all morning listening to my co-workers jibber-jabbering on about crap.  I hate not having something isolating me from the outside world!

At lunch time, I went to Coles on Bridge Rd to get earphones.  They only had kid’s ones — they don’t filter out outside noise.  I hate outside noise but beggars can’t be choosers and there is nowhere else around East Melbourne to buy earphones.  After I left the supermarket, there was a freaken gale blowing down Bridge Rd and it blew a huge chunk of rock into my eye.  Even though you couldn’t really see it, it was the size of a house brick I swear.

Got the tram back to work even though I was virtually blind (and had a scarf over my eyes).  Went to the bathroom and rinsed my eye.  And rinsed.  And dicked around.  After an hour, still no relief.  I talked to my boss and he sent me home (I was going to wait to see if it got better).  Got home and still no better.  After lots more rinsing and whinging and rinsing, finally is feeling okay. 

Now it is pouring rain and I have to go to Japanese class.  I could stay home but if I do, we will study some wacko verb form and I’ll never catch up. 

Tomorrow must be better, right?

This week

OMG our internet has been insanely bad this week.  I hate you, Dodo.  Hopefully I can actually post this.

Still struggling with food.  I am just an eating machine.  I have no idea why.  My biggest issue is eating at night while watching telly.  I figure the best way to deal with this is to have better/healthy snack foods in the house so at least I’m not eating bags of clinkers.

On the plus side – I did some exercise this week.  On Wednesday I went into the gym and used the boxing room.  I’d forgotten that, more than anything in this world, I love to hit stuff. 

Thursday I got a really bad gut ache.  Worse than anything I’ve known before.  The pain was so intense then I got all nauseous and sweating and stuff.  I really thought I’d faint.   Luckily it went away but I didn’t want to risk pushing myself after that.

Friday I was far too lazy to exercise.   I seem to get end of the week burn out.  I’m fine up to about Wednesday then I can’t be arsed making a healthy lunch/exercising/ doing anything at all really.

Yesterday I got out for a run but, after about 1 km, my shin really, really hurt.  I thought it might just be that I need to warm up more and I should push through it.  After another 100 metres, I realised I really shouldn’t push through it!  I ended up walking the other 4 km.  Except it was really cold.  If I’d know I was going to walk instead of running, I’d have taken a jacket.

Today I’m going to do some weights.  I was going to go to the gym but figure I can do just as well at home (without paying or having to talk to other people).  While I’m waiting for my new gym to actually open it’s doors, I’ve been thinking about going to a few different gyms that have casual membership but really done nothing more than think about it (except for the boxing the other night).

My goals for this week are:

• exercise every day, make at least 2 days those high intensity exercise (ie. not just walking to/from work)
• drink water.  LOTS of water.
• only one treat a day!

Argggghhh I’ve put on so much weight lately.  This insanity has to END.

Champion

I was going to post about all the ways in which I failed to meet my goals this week but hey, that shit’s for losers!  Instead I’m going to talk about all the ways in which I was a champion this week:

• the other day when the chocolates in the work kitchen called my name, I decided to get a yummy, juicy, crispy apple instead.  It rocked.
• I’ve done at least 30 minutes exercise 5 days this week.  One of the days I missed, I had a stomach bug.  I did 2 killer circuit workouts at the local playground — ha ha, I was doing my modified chin ups (feet on the ground) the other night and looked up to find a group of 4 little girls standing in front of me staring! 
• I’ve drank buckets of water this week.
• I ordered Coles online (it’s a PITA to get to the supermarket atm plus they carry the groceries up the stairs for me) then today I cooked up lots of food – a mince thing and some soup + chicken teriyaki so I can finally use my cute bento box I got in Japan and a potato thing.  I am all sorted for this week for food.
• Tonight I was procrasting about going for a run but finally got in my gear.  Walked outside and it’d been raining (I hadn’t noticed) and was about to change my mind.  Instead I grabbed my rain jacket and headed off.

That’s pretty damn good.  I deserve a gold star and an elephant stamp I reckon. 

I was thinking this week about weight loss and shit, as you do.  I’ve been in the mindset that I should lose weight before I move to Japan.  You know, I reckon nothing ever works when you put a “should” in front of it.  It just makes the whole thing a big drag. 

Anyway, about from wanting to lose weight for the sake of losing weight or to look hot or to fit into my too small clothes, I realise one BIG thing I’d been overlooking.  More than anything, I want to set off on this big adventure full of energy and life.  At the moment, my energy levels have been damn near comatose.  That sucks.  If I’m going to experience all I can, I need to be full of beans.  And I need to start beaning up now.  Also I can’t wait to move and be somewhere else to start enjoying life and having adventures.  That needs to start now too. 

Just like you can’t put your life on hold until you lose weight, you can’t do that about moving either.  If I’m not the person I want to be overseas before I leave, I never will be.

Things that matter

Lately I’ve been a bit blah about life.  Things that used to interest me and fill up my time have lost their appeal, so far nothing has come along to take their place. 

Shauna posted recently about happiness and I totally agree with what she says – having small daily pleasures while working towards a big goal.

How do you’settle on a big goal though?  You can just pluck one out of thin air.  I need a big goal, hey you’ll do.  Before you even work on achieving and the small steps, you have to have that swell of passion, the quicken of the heart, that falling-in-love honeymoon period.   Any goal worth anything is going have a period of cumbersomeness, whether it’s running a marathon, writing a book, building a house — to get through the hard bits, you have to have the huge swell of wanting to do something from the outset. 

Nothing does that for me at the moment.  Days are just days.  I can run, go to the gym, all that stuff but it’s not leading anywhere.  I need a big goal, a purpose.  I’m sure one will come popping along eventually.  I just need to stick it out until then.

Also

A while back I mentioned I took part in the filming of a video clip.  Well it’s now up on youtube.  You can’t see me in the crowd but it’s a great clip and a really catchy song.  Check it out.

Progress

I’ve managed to get my exercise in the past 2 days.  Yesterday I got out for a run.  Today I went to the local which is handily next to a big hill.  I did a circuit of hill runs, modified chinups, squats and pushups.  Did that 5 times and was pretty much stuffed.  Got home and then we decided to go back to the park and have a kick of the Sherrin!

Food hasn’t been so good.  But OMG have you tried the Green and Black’s butterscotch chocolate?  It is the best thing ever.  I think being broke is not helping.  When I have no money, I seem to live on carbs.  They are cheap and filling.  I might scrap together some money and get some fruit and vege at the supermarket tomorrow though. 

This week will definitely be an improvement.  For starters, it isn’t going to be so rainy so I can get in some walking to and from work.

Fizzled

After getting all revved up in my last post, I kinda fizzled out this week.  My goal was to do 30 minutes exercise every day but even that didn’t happen.  Lots of reasons/excuses but if I’d really wanted to do it, I’d have got around them.  This week I’m going to plan and make it happen.  I’m not going to let the cold weather and other things in life get in my way.  My other goal is record my food.  Even when I’m eating badly.  Got to start somewhere.

Kathryn states the obvious!

Since I got home, I’ve been doing little exercise (or anything really).  I’ve been feeling a bit sniffly and sick plus really lethargic so figured I’d wait for that to pass before getting back into an exercise routine.  I wanted to clean up and reorganise things at home too but kept putting it off.

So on Saturday I decided to stop being a big baby and just suck it up and do something.  Something is better than nothing, right?

I figured I could do an “easy” workout at home – run down the stairs, do 10 squats, run up the stairs and do 10 pushups – repeat 10 times.  OMG that was not easy!  I had to change the pushups to crunches halfway throughso my arms didn’t drop off (they are still sore today).

After I finished, I decided instead of sitting on my butt and being all self-congratulatory over my efforts, I’d keep moving.  Once you’ve got your heart rate up, that’s BONUS TIME!  Anyway, spending that long on the floor doing pushups and crunches made me realise how much I needed to clean the floors. 

I started off sweeping and tidying.  Ended up completely moving furniture and reorganising my bedroom.  It’s so much more spacious and unannoying now.

Then today I went for my first run in forever (I reckon close to a month).  It was a hard slog but I feel so much better now. 

Anyway, my point is you can’t wait for energy to come to you.  That’s never going to happen.  You need to start moving.  Use energy = get energy.

Many Rants

1. People keep saying that folk are going overboard about the swine flu – wearing face masks and all – when it’s mostly no worse than the real flu.  I think the opposite is true.  People don’t take precautions enough about the regular flu.  Like the bitch sitting opposite me hacking up her lungs on the tram.  Sending her nasty germs into the air.  Wearing a face mask to stop those air-borne germs won’t kill; me getting sick and having to take unpaid time off work might just mean a hatchet through your head on the other hand.

2. People walking down the street eating.  My god people do that a lot.  If you don’t have time to sit down, you don’t have time to eat.  It looks ugly.

3. Twilight.  Where do I start?  Okay, I thought this would be an easy, brainless read for the plane.  I mean, I can handle bad writing.  I don’t like it but I can see the redeeming features of a poor writing with an okay storyline.  I read the Da Vinci Code.  I read Harry Potter.

But Twilight… it really sucks.  Really really.  This is the storyline.  It’s a spoiler.  Read it.  Don’t read the book:

Stupid bint with no personality moves to a country town where she is flavour of the month (I’m resisting using the term “fresh blood” or anything like that).  Hooks up pale dude cos she thinks that he’s dreamy.  Ignores the fact that he’s not only freaky but extremely patronising and annoying (seriously, I’d only date this guy to take him out for a steak dinner… stake, vampire… geddit????).  Finds out he is a vampire and sparkles in the sunlight.  She makes new friends but dumps them completely when sparkly, annoying vampire gets with her.

Stupid bint frolics with vampires then gets kidnapped by other, less friendly but still patronising and annoying vampire cos she’s too stupid to tell the difference btw her real mother and a recording!  She deserves to die, obviously.  Instead vampires saves her.

She wants patronising bastard vampire to make her a vampire too – I think so if she’s still going out with him when she’s like 60, she won’t look like a pedo.  Instead vampire takes her to the prom.

I want to hunt down the woman who wrote this pile of shit and slowly pull her entrails out through her nasal cavities.  Even that would be less painful than actually reading the damn book (I only finished it cos I’d read the Jetstar magazine 4 times and done the sudoku twice). 

The writing sucks, the characters are completely unlikeable – I was so hoping they all died horrible deaths even though I know there are like a zillion sequels.  And there is no freaken plot.  None.  Is there a secret law in publishing that you can’t have vampires and plots in the same book or was it just a fashion started by Anne Rice.  (I was about to say Stephanie Rice then, lolz, but she’d prolly write an awesome book about swimming, partying vampires). 

This book makes Flowers in the Attic look like a work of genius.  It makes Valley of the Books look like awesome (which it kinda is).  It makes Noddy Goes to Toyland look like a Pulitzer Prize by comparison – a least Noddy had a plot.  There is NO book in this world that not better than Twilight even those Mills and Boon doctor and nurse romances. 

4. My swipe card for my new job is so tiny, I keep thinking I’ve lost it.  It’s insanely small, not even a card.

That’s it for today’s rants.

I’m thinking…

my life would have to be better if I owned these boots!  But they don’t ship to Australia.  Damn damn damn.