Move

Moving today, just crossing my fingers everything goes smoothly!  I prolly won’t have internet access for a while.

Stop the Insanity!

I tell you, things are going from bad to worse around here with our landlords.  Basically what’s happened is that we didn’t hear from them at all for over a year then around Christmas time they send us all emails saying we owed heaps of back rent!  And they wanted it NOW.

We have been trying to work things out with them but OMG they are so insane.

Firstly, they had rent records going back to Oct 2007 – which was when I went from paying them cash to making bank deposits.  They say I was 4 weeks behind in my rent then.  I found a paper receipt they’d given me in Sept 2007 which proved I was up to date.  They aren’t acknowledging that receipt – even though it’s signed by them and they have the carbon copy in their receipt book! 

Next up, we have a new person managing things.  The girl we used to deal with went o/seas and now her sister has taken over.  The sister is insane, I swear.  She has sent me 3-4 emails a day (after I told her not to ring me during business hours) – I keep thinking I’ve got everything sorted and then she gets back in touch with me and it’s all back to square one.  Plus she keeps wanting all this stuff – like to see a copy of my driver’s licence – that she legally can’t ask for.

I emailed her on Friday telling her I’d been in touch with the Tenant’s Union and what she’s doing is unlawful. 

She came around yesterday morning and served a Notice to Vacate on my sister!  She knows my sister works in hospitality and doesn’t get home until really late yet came around here at 9 am to wake her up (she hadn’t got to bed until about 4 am so you can imagine…)

Anyway she told my sister she has to be out of the house in 2 days.  Like hell.  You can’t legally evict a tenant without going to court and getting an eviction notice.  That’s the law.

Hopefully it will all be sorted out by Wednesday.  I don’t want to say too much on here being a public place and all, but I want to get out of this mess for once and for all.   It’s really been upsetting me and I just refuse to keep dealing with it.

And again…

My landlord is going from insane to insaner… she keeps misinterpreting my emails, on purpose I think, and making stupid demands like wanting a copy of my driver’s licence??? WTF?  Anyway I might be out of here real soon (although not soon enough for me).

I feel like I’ve been a total pig today even though if I look at it objectively I haven’t eaten that much.  Well, other than a thin slice of caramel cheesecake for arvo tea.  But I just had a bowl of soup of dinner and my belly feels stuffed. 

I meant to go to the gym today but am so exhausted.  I did buy new runners – yah!  And a coat – 20% off at Target then a bonus $5 voucher they were giving out.  It’s red.

More blerks

I’ve been having a shithouse week and I think a lot of it comes back to lack of sleep. It makes me cranky and emotional.  On top of that, more landlord issues.  OMG they are insane.  We have yet another family member taken over collecting rent and seem to be having the same conversation over and over.  Just when we think things are resolved, she goes back to square 1.  I really think they want us to move out but, instead of just telling us to move out like normal people (I think if you give enough notice you can do that), they want to drive us out.  Just a few weeks until we move so hopefully that will take care of that.

On a more awesome note, I’ve discovered the most delish bars of orange chocolate at the local health food shop.  It’s dark organic chocolate and only 200 calories a bar.  Magic.  I bought some last night and had it on my way to go-go class.  This morning I woke up early and realised I had nothing in the house for breakfast.  I had cereal but nothing to eat with it.  Was thinking of popping to the bakery for some fruit toast but decided to get to work early instead.  I have some breakfast bars at work.

Anyway got to the carpark at work, so hungry I didn’t think I could make it inside.  Luckily I found the leftover half a bar of chocolate in my bag (go me, having leftover chocolate is indeed a miracle).  So chocolate for breakie.. the breakfast of champions!

And I have Friday off work – yahs!  I was annoyed when they first told me not to come in Friday on account of wanting money but now I’m happy about it.  I might go shopping for running shoes.  I can’t get them online/mail order cos I have no idea what I want.  I just need something that doesn’t start squishing my toes after I run for 40 mins (that seems to be the point where my feet start swelling).  Or maybe I just need to run much faster so it doesn’t take me more than 40 mins

Enough

Every week I log my weigh in figures on Calorie King and, over the past weeks it’s been like this – down .5 kg, up .5 kg… repeat.

I’ve had enough.  I’m not losing the same .5 kg and having it find me again and again.  A few years ago when I wanted to get to my goal weight I adopted a motto: STOP DICKING AROUND.  I need to bring that back.

I know exactly where my problem lies – I have about 3-4 days a week where I’m on track, exercising, eating well.  Then I get complacent and indulge.  Not major binges but a cupcake here and few glasses of champagne there.  It adds up, especially when coupled with no exercise.  I’ve got to keep the momentum going.  This would be all fine and dandy if I wanted to maintain my weight but I don’t.  Enough is enough.  No more dicking around.

More about today…

Got halfway through my post this morning then got distracted.

Anyway, I feel a bit blerk this weekend.  Not sure why.  I’m thinking maybe because I was drinking on Friday night and Saturday night.  I haven’t been drinking that much lately and, even though it was just a few glasses each time, it really zaps my energy.

I went for a run yesterday.  I couldn’t decide whether to do a long run or leave that for today.  Got about 2-3 kms into it and realised a long run was totally out of the question.  I hadn’t drank much water before I started and it was HOT.  So dehydrated and feeling flat.  Ended up doing just over 8 kms and very slow.  Then today I had no motivation to run.  No motivation to do anything.  Now I’m feeling bad because Run for the Kids is in 2 weeks and I’ve not done more than 8 kms in the last 2 weekends (did 14 km two weeks ago).  Oh well, maybe I’ll fit a longer run in this week.

Also my weight’s not moving.  I’ve been hovering around the same mark for weeks.  Arrggghh!  And instead of getting all organised and ready for the week ahead with cooking etc, I just slacked off.  I guess I just have to be extra organised during the week.  I’ve been too tempted by cafe treats around 3 o’clock at work so need to find something I can take to work to combat that.  I just don’t feel like fruit so something a bit more substantial.

I guess I’ve just got to get out of the mindset that if I don’t get organised on the weekend, I won’t get organised all week.  I only work 8 hours a day, that leaves plenty of time in the day for cooking, exercising, getting my shit together.  I just need to pull my finger out and do it!

ps. I have had a good weekend, lots of socialising and fun.  Just no motivation to eat well or exercise!

Blerky Stuff

Went to Smith St to look for running shoes this morning.  I thought if I got there early, I’d avoid the awful people.  No such luck – awful people start shopping earlier than they used to.  Seriously, how hard is it to NOT let your kids wreak havoc in shops while screaming at the top of their lungs?  How hard is it NOT to walk backwards and forwards in front of someone looking at stuff?  How hard is it to have some common manners?  Anyway, no luck with shoes so it was a wasted trip.

Random

• Yesterday I went to the Loreal Powder Room at the Fashion Festival.  They were supposedly doing makeovers but they just bunged on some lippy (you could choose between lips, hair, skin or nails but the girl in front of us in the line said the hair and skin options were just them telling you what to use).  Still we got a bag of goodies so it was worth it.
• I really, really need to get out for a run today.  I’m so procrastinating.  I’m supposed to tape my knee because my physio told me to but I don’t want to.  Also I can’t find the scissors to cut the tape.
• I’m thinking about buying running shoes.  I really need to get new ones this weekend if I want to wear them for Run for the Kids but the thought of all the weekend shoppers on Smith St is putting me off.
• There are so many things I want to buy at the moment and I need to save money.  I tried on the most awesome red coat in Target – kind of ’60s style.  First I tried on a size 16 and it went nowhere near fitting me.  I was so very depressed.  I was like OMG I can’t even fit into a size 16.  Just as I was about to drop into a temper tantrum to shame a 2 year old, I remembered how slack they are in Target so I checked the size on the coat (the hanger said 16) and it was really a size 10.  Then I was like – whoa, this size 10 almost totally fits me… yah!
• I also found the most awesome ’20s style hat.  I want it so much.  It’s red.  I have a real problem with hats.  If I try them on, I always want them because hats always look good on me.  I don’t need another one, but then it is red.
• I also tried on a cardigan/coat (it’s knitted but lined) at a local shop.  They had one in the window a few weeks ago but it was the wrong size so they got one in for me.  Anyway it’s still too small but very lovely and I almost talked myself into buying it but am resisting.  It is too small.
• I woke up this morning thinking I’d got way drunk last night and couldn’t remember where I’d left my car; then I realised I’d only had 2 drinks and I’d caught the tram home!!!  I’d been dreaming that I got drunk!

This week has been okay, food and diet wise.  I had commitments (hairdressers, physio) that cut into my exercise time.  I could have gone out for a run or something after the hairdressers but in reality, I’m not going to get my shiny new hair all sweaty then have to wash it and have half the colour come out! 

Eating has been mostly good.  Could have been better but could have been much worse. 

This week I want to get into more weights.  I have been reading this article on Stumptious and want to try it but it does involve some thinking and planning  because it’s all stuff like “pull up variation” so I need to figure out what to do for that (cos god knows I can’t do a real pullup). 

I also want to start doing some more stretching and pilates.  I have a dvd of 10 min pilates workouts which I *should* be able to fit into my day, you’d think.  But putting a dvd in the laptop is soooo much effort. 

Anyway, must run (literally).

Gym Junkie!

I am starting to think I’m a gym junkie – not because I spend hours knocking myself out at the gym but because I can’t resist joining them!

A while back I cancelled my membership with my gym because I never went.  I intended to exercise on my own with occasional visits to the $4 gym up the road.  That made sense.

So, last night, I was in the city, waiting for my tram and thought I’d just pop into check out the new Virgin Active.  Not intention of joining, just to have a look.  They gave me free coffee.  They showed me a computer simulation of the club.  They told me all about the features.  I didn’t sway.

She showed me the bikes.  Not ordinary old blah exercise bikes but ones with a “game” on the attached monitor.  You have to steer and change gears and all.  Just like riding a real bike without the danger of being mashed by a truck!

Still I held strong.

Then she showed me the cardio machines.  With monitors.  And you can dock your ipod… and watch your freaken music videos from your ipod on the monitor, while you work out.  Since the only thing stopping me watching music videos when I run is the danger of DEATH, it’s perfect.  OMG.  So perfect.

They have other stuff too indoor rock climbing wall and a pool and SLEEPING PODS … but OMFG… watching my ipod sold me!

I just have to wait until May for them to open.

***

On the topic of ipods, I have a bit of a rant.  Freaken people are always saying you shouldn’t run while listening to your ipod because of the danger risk.  Like someone can come up from behind and clock you over the head without you noticing because you can’t hear them.

That sounds like good advice on the surface, but think about it.  I’m out for my run.  There are girl walking home from the train/tram stops all around the place.  Girls in tottery heels.  Girls who are tipsy.  Girls who listening to their ipods in their drunken, high-heel wearing states.  I don’t think Mr Attack is going to target super-fast (relatively fast…)  running me over them.

While it’s important to protect yourself and to be alert to danger, it shits me.  It just reinforces the idea that women are weak and vulnerable.  Don’t leave your house.  Don’t go out at night.  Don’t do anything… excuse me while I break into a few verses of  “Just a Girl” by No Doubt.

Also, why is it only women that are warned?  It’d be interesting to see the stats on non-domestic violence – I bet there are just as many guys attacked by random strangers as women, esp if you include drunken brawls etc.  I bet there are lots, lots, lots more women attacked by guys they know than are ever attacked when out running. 

There are freaks out there but it’s better to do the things you enjoy rather than sitting at home quaking with fear.  Personally, I encounter far more freaks and psychos on the tram than I ever have out running anyway.

Self Awareness is the Boobie Prize!

I heard it said a while back that self awareness is the boobie prize and I’m starting to figure it out.  It goes something like this:

You often hear the peeps say things like:

I’m an emotional eater.  I always eat when I’m upset.

That’s showing self awareness.  You’ve looked at your behaviour and worked out the whys.  But it’s the boobie prize – in fact it’s worse than the boobie prize.  It’s an “out”, an excuse for every cream cake and donut.

If you delve deeper, you can get more specific:

When my boss yells at me for something that’s not my mistake, I overeat.

At least every upsetting instance isn’t a reason for overeating.   But you still aren’t changing, you’re just analysing.  You need to take the next step, the biggie.  The fork in the road that takes you onto the path of change (btw, does anyone else still crack up all these years later whenever they think of the “turn left at the fork in the road” joke from the Muppet Movie?)

This change is so simple but seismic:

When my boss yells at me for something that’s not my mistake, I sometimes overeat.

See what I did there?  You are going from binging every time to sometimes.  Even if it’s just one time in your life when you were in this situation and DIDN’T cope by overeating, it sets a pattern for the future.  You can do it.  Now look at why you didn’t act in your usual way on this occasion – you go busy and forgot to eat, you got distracted by shiny things, whatever.

Now you can think:

When my boss yells at me for something that’s not my mistake, sometimes I distract myself with other work.

You are totally fooling your brain into a whole new way of thinking.  Sure, you might still binge sometimes but it’s not the only option.  You know you can do other things; you’ve done it before.

Of course, if you listen to the self-help gurus and those people who run assertiveness training courses, the yummy pink icing on the cake is when you can say:

When my boss yells at me for something that’s not my mistake, I defuse the situation then tell him how that makes me feel.

And, you know, that works in some situations.  It really does.  But if anyone thinks that is the be all and end all, I’ve got some housemates they can borrow for 5 minutes!  Some people are just arseholes.  Some people will go out of their way to upset you just for the joy of seeing you upset (and of course some people have their own agendas that are in conflict with yours).

If you really want to clock this game, as the kiddies say (well okay, like they used to say 10 years ago), then after lots of work and effort and trying you might get to this:

When my boss yells at me for something that’s not my mistake, that’s his problem.  I know my work is good.

I’m not saying this because I’m all enlightened and full of positive goodness.  I’m saying this because it’s something I’ve worked on and am working on still.  The thing is when someone upsets you, someone is going to lose.  If you stuff down your feeling with jellycakes then you are the one losing.  If you learn to cope then you win (even if you and your size tiny jeans are the only ones that know it).